Mother Dearest
by blue sakuras
Summary: AU [one-shot] Shippou decides to finally sneak away to join to cries of war... will his Mother be able to convince him to stay? [InuXKag]
1. Oneshot!

Inspired by the movie Troy. [Just call this a late late late mother's day one-shot or whatever...-.-;]

Mother Dearest  
  
By: bs  
  
As Shippou stalked through the dark, empty halls, he couldn't help but wonder if he would get caught and what the punishment his father would deal upon him for this.  
  
Either way, he was going to do this. He had dreamed of this since he had been a child. No one – and NO ONE was going to stop him. He treaded through the hallways, made a right and paused at the wooden door that stood before him.  
  
He leaned toward the door, and pressed his forehead against the smooth wood. He raised a hand to the doorknob, and traced a finger over it lightly. "I'm sorry." he whispered to the door.  
  
"Sorry for what?" a soft voice asked him from behind. Shippou spun around... to face the person he did not want to catch him upon his quest.  
  
"Mother..." he said softly. She smiled sorrowfully, her face half in the dark.  
  
"You were going to sneak away in the darkness of the night weren't you?" she asked. Shippou opened his mouth to speak, but was silenced. "It's alright. I will let you go. Just let me talk with you for a little while longer ne?"  
  
Shippou nodded and turned to open the door but his mother's hand, placed firmly on his, stopped him. "Your father is still in there. Do you really want him to know?"  
  
Shippou immediately released his hold of the door. The last thing he wanted, besides having Mother find him, was to have his father awaken and find him gone.  
  
Led by his mother, Shippou silently followed her to wherever they were going. As they walked, Shippou took a good look at his mother from the corner of his eyes.  
  
She had been a great beauty years ago and it still shined on her face. Old age was slowly gracing her.  
  
Her long silky raven-black hair had tinges of silver, which was noticeable by only those with the keenest eyes.  
  
Her slim figure was still there, but the weight of being a perfect female role model had its weight on her over the years.  
  
Her face still radiated with beauty and intelligence. The only wrinkles she had were around her eyes, from smiling so much. Her sparkling blue eyes were sharp and did not miss a thing.  
  
But... still. He could tell. The hurt. The worry. The disappointment.  
  
She reeked of it. She was ashamed of him.  
  
Reaching a private room of his mother's, they slipped in and she locked the door. She then walked over to the window and sat by the seat that faced the window.  
  
"Come. Sit." She motioned to the chair next to her.  
  
He hesitantly sat in the chair and gazed out of the window, watching the stars twinkle.  
  
The sky was beautiful. Mother Athena was smiling down on them. "It's a beautiful night sky." he whispered.  
  
"Yes. It is. Shippou, tell me why you want to leave." his mother questioned.  
  
He gulped. "You know why."  
  
She turned her head to face him, and smiled slightly. "I'm getting old. Remind me again."  
  
Shippou knew that the last thing that would ever be to go was her memory, but he told her anyway. "I want to sail off to find a king to serve. I want to fight in a war. I want to bring honor to our family name."  
  
"What is wrong serving under the king you are under right now?" she arched an eyebrow skeptically at her son.  
  
"Where are you going with this Mother?" he exclaimed, a bit tired of this. He had told her numerous times what he wanted to do with his life, but she had never asked him questions or tried to dissuade him. It was his father that did that.  
  
"Just answer it please."  
  
"Alright," he answered after a long pause. He remembered that his mother could still go and wake his father. That would not be pleasant. Although she was not the type of person to do that, she had already surprised him twice tonight. And probably a few more times before he was actually allowed to leave.  
  
"I don't want to serve under this king for a good reason Mother. Dad will just be easier on me and everyone else will treat me different. And don't tell me they won't. They do."  
  
"That's the price you pay for being a prince darling." she frowned. "And your father would have certainly not went easier on you if you had joined the army here! He would have worked you to death!" Shippou sniggered.  
  
"That is true though. But all the other men would spite me if I did anything well and got promoted or anything like that. They would say it was just because my father is the king. And... if I did something wrong, they would all laugh and ask what had happened to my royal blood." Shippou bowed his head.  
  
His mother said nothing and when he looked up, he saw that she had gone back to staring at the endless sky, all the happiness wiped from her face. Now that he saw it, he just saw just how old his mother was. Her happiness, her peppy attitude stole the light from her old age.  
  
After all, she was just a mortal. Dad... Dad would live a lot longer. The only reason Mother was aging like this was because she was the mate of a hanyou. She was only living so long because she had married a hanyou... if only Dad was a full youkai.  
  
Then she would be hanyou. It would have made it easier to face her tonight. Having not met a potential mate, Shippou showered his Mother with all his love. But... he had to leave. And never come back.  
  
He was afraid. He didn't want to see his mother dying. He didn't want to see her pale, lifeless corpse. He didn't want to see his strong, stubborn father break down from it.  
  
He wanted to pretend it would never happen. He wanted to pretend that he would not outlive his parents by centuries. He did not want to think of such a horrible life.  
  
"Do you despise your father for being hanyou?" the whisper of a question met his ear.  
  
Shippou was startled by it. He had assumed his mother was dozing off. "No! Why would you assume such a thing?"  
  
"The look on your face. That is the look you always have on your face when you are thinking of your father." she smiled. "Would you like me to tell you what I see in that mask of emotion you wear?"  
  
Shippou nodded.  
  
"Very well. I'll tell you. It's a mix of Hate. Anger. Sorrow. Hate. Love. Admiration."  
  
Shippou narrowed his eyes into slits. "I do not love or admire that man." She sighed.  
  
"You do. Why would you be so ashamed as to run away in the middle of the night, when no one will find you missing until tomorrow afternoon?"  
  
He bowed his head. "Shippou. Look at me. Your father is not the type to hug you and say he loves you, that he is proud of you. He is not that type of person." she looked at him reproachfully. "And don't give me that sour look. I know he treats me like that. I love him for that. But... it is not easy for him. It took me a year for that – "  
  
"I've been his son for thirty years. What about that?" Shippou spat out and glared at his mother, but the look quickly softened as he knew it was wrong to take out the anger on his mother.  
  
"It was hard Shippou. I had to try so hard. There were so many obstacles to overcome. His past lover came six months into our marriage, when I was just getting to him." his mother's voice began to waver. But she continued, "and it seemed for the moment, that he was going to leave me. I was pregnant with your brother, you know that? He didn't though. I had cast a spell and had wanted to surprise him with the news the night I found him in her arms." His mother's words were becoming more bitter. "But I held through. That woman... she had no right to do this. Not because I was jealous you know? Because she had stabbed him in the back and wanted him to embrace her again.  
  
"And he did. That was what angered me, what caused me such pain. I've never told you that before have I?"  
  
"No." Shippou's cold tone tore at her heart, "but it gives me another reason to leave behind that asshole and leave his damned kingdom to ruins."  
  
"Don't talk about your father that way! He was under the influence of love." her voice softened and Shippou would not have heard the rest of what she had to say if he wasn't demon. "And as was I, to take him back. I'm not saying I regret being with you father Shippou.  
  
"It was the best mistake I ever made. Staying by your father's side. Do you know what made up for what he put me through for two months?"  
  
"No. It better have been good though."  
  
"When I saw his face when I told him I was pregnant."  
  
Shippou scoffed. "I have no more respect for that man."  
  
She frowned. "Shippou... do not be so difficult. You father... he..."  
  
"_Worries_ for me. He _cares_ about me. He _loves_ me. I know. I know. But those are just words. I care not for words more than what the soul tells me. I don't care for him and he doesn't care for me. Mother, don't look so sad. It's true. I talked with him once, that one time you thought we had bonded. We settled it out though.  
  
"And the only reason we did not have a death match nor will we ever have one is because of one reason. You. Alright? So stop this nonsense about him already."  
  
She nodded.  
  
"I know you still want to leave. But I have not yet told you what I wanted to say."  
  
"Well... what did you want to say?"  
  
"Why a soldier? Why such a horrible way to live? Your life could be at stake any moment from the enemy."  
  
Shippou bit his lip. "I'm not sure. There is some honor in this. And I have trained well."  
  
"I know you have. But... have you ever actually seen a battlefield? Have you ever fathomed what it would be like? Standing there, in the field, surrounded by your fellow soldiers? The enemy, seeming like a never-ending swarm of darkness. Their weapons seem sharper, better than what you hold you in your hands. Their shields, shining in the sun, glare at you and taunt you with their strength.  
  
"The noise they make. Have you ever heard that noise?" his mother's voice was down to a whisper again.  
  
Shippou felt something in his throat and he wanted nothing more than to leave this room. Leave the county. Leave.  
  
"No." he replied hoarsely. But as he uttered that one word, he suddenly pictured himself, adorned in his father's armor, holding a sword, a shield in the other. And it suddenly struck him. A noise... a loud, low rumbling echoing in his ear. A monster roar. Thunder, blood, war, loss... it rang in his ears.  
  
"Well, my son, I have. It is the worst. It hits the innermost part of your soul. It makes you afraid." His mother's voice broke him out of his trance- like daydream of a nightmare.  
  
"What? How?" His mother? Battlefield? He couldn't see her in such a desolate and savage place.  
  
"Do you think your father has not fought countless wars? Battles? And he has come out the winner each time. He still fights. And each time he dresses up in his armor, I still have a dreadful feeling, like a serpent coiling up in me, and it will strike. One day, your father will not be the winner of the battle. Each time he went, I stayed. But...  
  
"Once, just once. I was foolish enough to sneak away without his knowledge and followed him. At first I was just suspicious, but I soon realized there was a reason he did not tell me he was going to fight. It was a death match, as most of the challenges he accepts are those, and it was one on one. It was against a wolf youkai by the name of Kouga. Kouga had announced that I was his woman, and... Inuyasha, being the way he is, fought to the death with Kouga. I saw them fight. I saw the blood. I saw my husband kill another man, just to keep me."  
  
"Mother..."  
  
"I had seen a battlefield many times before and after that incident. That noise... that horrible thundering of the thing men call 'victory'. What is a victory? The slaughtering of men? Most of which never expected it to end as such?"  
  
"Mother... you – "  
  
"No!" she snapped harshly. "You sit and listen. If you want to be a soldier, you must hear this. The blood that your father shed... the blood of someone I knew... it was horrid. I would not look at him for weeks. He soon became suspicious, but I soon overcame that. Because he is the man I love, regardless of what he does. To this day, he still does not know I saw it."  
  
"And your uncle... he is not the most kind of youkai lords. When I was a servant there, I cleaned up so much blood and washed out stains that when I first came to live here, I was astonished by how... clean it was here."  
  
"Mother. I get it. You can stop now." Shippou whispered, but Kagome, who did not have youkai hearing, rambled on.  
  
"Shippou, do you really want to kill me?"  
  
"W-what?" What was going on in his mother's head? Kill her? What?  
  
"I will die if you leave, you know that. I can not relinquish another one of my children to the cries and horrors of war." The azure blue eyes of Kagome were shining... and Shippou knew he was causing his mother to die from the inside.  
  
"I'm not like my brother. I won't be that foolish!" Shippou cried, standing up.  
  
Kagome stood up slowly and unrushed, quite unlike the mannerisms of her husband and second child. "I know. But... he was not foolish either Shippou. And he still... he... he..." her breathes became shudders as she began to sob, her hands raising to cover her face.  
  
"What is the meaning of such a racket at such a late hour?!" A voice boomed as a figure strode into the room. Shippou paled. It was Inuyasha. He was immediately at the side of his wife and embracing her, whispering into her ear. He turned to face Shippou and glared. "Boy, you better have a damned good reason for this hell of a racket you have raised."  
  
"F-father..."  
  
"Silence!" His roar echoed down the halls, but miraculously, no one awoke to see what was wrong.  
  
The lengthy silence was only disturbed by the gasping sobs of Kagome.  
  
Eyes slit, Inuyasha bared his fangs at Shippou and glared while he tried to figure out what had transpired in the room to cause his beloved so much anguish.  
  
Then it hit him all at once. "You were sneaking away to go serve on some army weren't you boy?"  
  
Shippou looked at the floor, refusing to answer. Inuyasha growled. "Go to your room. I'll deal with you later."  
  
He gingerly picked up his wife, and left the room. Shippou scowled as soon as his father left the room and quickly went to his room.  
  
The next morning, Shippou got up quite early, and sat on his balcony, watching the sunrise. He had not been able to sleep very much. He stayed up listening to the heart wrenching sobs from his mother and a low voice soothing her.  
  
Sighing, he watched as the stars disappeared from the sky and were replaced with a bold bright blue that was soft and quiet in the sky. Quite like his mother's eyes. Bold... quiet... contradicting each other.  
  
She had to be treated with care. She was more fragile than a human baby. Mating to Inuyasha... a hanyou... and she... now a hanyou's mate... with miko blood.  
  
Pure miko blood. And she bonded with father, causing her inner turmoil. Battle of evil and good.  
  
Battle of physical and spiritual. Just the thought of it drove Shippou wild. How had his mother survived? He, himself, was supposed to be one fourth demon and three fourths human. Half miko, one fourth demon, and one fourth an ordinary man.  
  
But his mother had used her divine powers and 'healed' him of his human blood.  
  
Shippou stood up and went to the bathroom, washing his face to wake himself.  
  
He had decided. He would stay. He would stay until his mother's passing. If she could deal with such torture each and every moment of her being, he could deal with being here and watching her waste away. He was strong enough.  
  
He would not be the cause of his mother's death. The words she spoke of last night...

_"Do you really want to kill me?"_  
  
No. No he didn't. He understood now. He would not. He would stay by his mother's side until the end of her time. Then he would leave. There would be nothing left after that.  
  
...Maybe he should take his little sister with him. But Shippou shook that idea off. Inuyasha, albeit a person he hated and loved at the same time, was still his father. Even though he despised him more than he loved him, he would leave his darling little sister with his father.  
  
But for now... he would stay with his mom.  
  
That was enough for now. He could train and become a hero, worshipped and loved by thousands. But none of that was up to measure with that of a mother's love.

AN: I don't know how the HELL I weaved a plot out of this. It's a one-shot! ANOTHER ONE! YAY!  
  
I, personally, had only ONE idea for a PART of this and the rest sorta just...came along.  
  
The only part I had gotten certain was the part about the battefield... the war... I watched Troy. There were thousands of men standing there, each on opposite sides. They all had shields and long spears. They were banging those spears against the shields.  
  
I couldn't help but be awed by that moment. The glory of it took me.  
  
But... since I'm the only person I know [besides sin] that loves that kind of stuff, I took it from a different point of view.  
  
What if you were standing there? Hearing that thunder rolling across the land?  
  
Hearing that? And trembling?  
  
Because those making that noise would be those that you would have to fight.  
  
Well... that's about it. -.- I got a whole one-shot of eight... EIGHT freakin' pages.  
  
just from that. gods. am I just strange or what? Please review! .


	2. Follow up Poem!

Wrote this... dunno when. Must have been shortly after doing 'Mother Dearest'. Oh well. It's a short little follow up on Kagome's perspective, I guess...

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Have you ever heard it?  
That sound?  
That thundering?  
  
That horrid sound?  
Those heartwrenching cries?

The sound of war,  
despite what many have said,  
Is not glorious.

Not with honor,  
Not with grace.

Those horrid noises,  
Rolling 'bout the land.

What is so glorious about death?  
What is so honorable about killing?

Who says that having a man's blood on your hands is good?  
The sound of war.

The cries of men.  
The thundering of footsteps.  
The cries of pain.  
The hurt in their eyes.

The fear in their eyes.

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Review =P [and i can't figure out the spacing that's going on... so ignore the lil' dots... =.=]


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